Thinking Again - Challenge Your Thought Process

“We learn more from people who challenge our thought process than those who affirm our conclusions. Strong leaders engage their critics and make themselves stronger. Weak leaders silence their critics and make themselves weaker.”

― Adam M. Grant, Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don't Know

I haven't been an avid reader for most of my life, having only read a handful of books. However, I'm trying to change that. In December 2023, a good friend gifted me David Goggins' second book, "Never Finished." This book profoundly changed my perspective, especially towards reading. Since then, I've sought out books on leadership, resilience, and mindset. This journey led me to more of David Goggins' work, Simon Sinek, and Adam Grant. I read "Hidden Potential" and loved it. When I saw "Think Again" at an airport bookstore, I bought it. The main takeaway for me was to challenge the foundations of what you think you know and to consider that maybe you could be wrong. I believe this book should be mandatory for anyone in a leadership role, especially in law enforcement, parenting, and coaching.

 When I started Northern Lights Athletic Club, I had spent two decades in law enforcement. I had never been a coach, except for one season of outdoor soccer for my daughter's 5U team. Police officers are often resistant to change, perhaps because in a profession filled with unpredictability, we crave the security and stability of what we can control. This stability often leads us to do things the way they've always been done, simply checking off boxes in our best practices. Throughout my career, I always thought outside the box—sometimes I was right, sometimes I was wrong. At a time when I was questioning myself, "Think Again" inspired me to continue questioning processes to improve them or keep them the same, not out of fear of change but because they were still fundamentally sound.

 I suggested that this book be a mandatory read for parents. Parents can also be stuck in their ways of thinking. We learn from our parents, who learned from theirs, and so on. These parenting methods are challenged daily by our own children, and I believe it's important to build trust by standing behind our parenting with facts, not just saying, "that's how I was raised" or "just do it and don't question me." For example, while reading this book, I rethought my stance on sunscreen and built trust with my daughter. On a recent vacation to a warm beach resort, I watched as my daughter applied SPF30, refusing my suggestion to use SPF60, which I believed was far superior. As she started turning pink, I gave her the "I told you so" look and handed her the SPF60. She told me there wasn't much difference between the two and walked back into the sun. This book made me research the difference, and I learned that my thinking was wrong, kind of. Although there is a difference, it's slight and not what I had thought. I admitted I was wrong, and we had a conversation about why I thought what I did and what I learned because of her questioning me.

 This leads me to coaches. Coaches are another group of leaders in the community who impact youth. Coaches are often considered experts in the sport they coach, and as a parent, I often thought the best coaches had played at a higher level. While this can be true, I began to rethink my stance when I was considering starting Northern Lights Athletic Club to teach developmental volleyball to youth. Someone said to me, "You have never played volleyball and you're not a coach." For a moment, I doubted myself, but then I started thinking. The greatest player in NHL history had a coaching record of 143-161-24. Richard Williams, father to Venus and Serena, did not play tennis. Basketball shooting coach Dave Love described himself as an average high school player who was a good shooter. I began to think about what a coach really is and concluded that a coach is a leader.

 I decided that my years of leadership in law enforcement, parenting, and coaching my own daughters at home were qualifications enough to begin my coaching journey in developmental volleyball for youth. My motivations only strengthened my resolve. I immersed myself in readings, videos, and courses to become a better leader and coach. I know my limits and am not claiming I can coach a team of performance athletes. However, I can create a love of sport and teach the basics to youth, laying a foundation for their next coach. To all those on the fence about starting something new, think again about what is really holding you back from making a positive impact. To those of you holding strong onto your beliefs, it is okay to question them.

 I am not a doctor or professional, and this is just my opinion.